Life can be very tiring especially if you have a family. From getting the children ready for school, dealing with the traffic, coping with their attitude at times, helping out with homework; WoW! Sometimes it can be a bit overwhelming.
But do you know what is even worse, having to deal with a lousy manager on top of your hectic personal life? You now have to work with someone who has tons of problems leading and who care precious little about vision, values inspiration and motivation. On one of my previous jobs, I used to have constant thoughts of quitting because it was very demotivating to go to work every day. I eventually left, because my life is worth so much more than sacrificing my piece of mind for a stressful environment, it doesn’t make sense in my book.
But as I get more knowledgeable about management and Leadership, I sympathize with these managers who are thrust into a position without any training, self-development or mentorship. Simply because, leadership requires a different type of mindset and a lot of people who are promoted to a “Leadership” position are not ready to lead; they may be able to manage but lead, No.
According to Asia Pacific managing people is one of the most demanding yet rewarding skills set you can have. Many newly promoted managers and supervisors failed to transit from a high performance individual into an effective team manager. Alarmingly, the latest Survey by CareerBuilder shows that close to 60% of new managers and supervisors receive no formal management training and are ill prepared for the new challenges and roles without proper guidance.
Commonly cited stats estimate that about 60% of newly promoted managers fail within the first year (Ashkenas, 2015), pointing to a critical miscalculation in the decision process for selecting who is ready for “next level” management. As a result here are 3 common reasons new managers fail and what you can do about it.
Negative self-talk
When it comes to the worst things for our mental health, constant negativity is definitely one of them, especially if you are managing or leading people. When it comes to thoughts about yourself, your self-image serves as a sieve, filtering every experience and interaction while creating a running inner dialogue. You talk to yourself regularly about all of your experiences – what you think about yourself, the way you see others, etc.
This ongoing, internal dialogue is your “self-talk,” and it goes with you everywhere. When these private conversations are positive, they support you and work in your best interest. When they’re negative, they’re destructive and demoralizing, and as a result, it impedes your leadership abilities.
Recommendation
- Make a list of all the things that trigger self-doubt and create a strategy to mitigate these occurrences.
- Reduce your inner doubt through physical activity, or other types of relaxation.
- Spend some time exploring the values and principals that you feel most strongly about and write down the important ones.
- When current strategies are not working, make the necessary changes to your plans, activities, objectives, or behavior.
Justifying your behavior and blaming others
Do you find it hard to admit when you’re wrong? I read an article where the author shared his experience when he heard a leader blaming everyone else for the way he was acting: "I sat there listening to this poor justification for unacceptable behavior thinking to myself: The excuses that people come up with never cease to amaze me.” but that Theory of Cognitive Dissonance.
The feeling of discomfort caused by performing an action that is discrepant from one’s self-concept, cognitive dissonance always produces discomfort, and in response, many people try to reduce it by blaming others for their actions. There is no I in team and leadership is all about building and creating an environment that allows their people to maximize their full potential while in the process helping the company achieves its objectives.
Recommendation
- Lead by example and encourage others in a positive way
- Validate your team by creating trust.
- Genuinely show interest in helping others.
- Admit when you are wrong
Lacking Emotional Intelligence
For leaders, having emotional intelligence is essential for success. After all, who is more likely to succeed – a leader who shouts at his team when he's under stress, or a leader who stay in control, and calmly assesses the situation?
Leaders with self-control stay calm and clear-headed while under stress or during a crisis and maintain emotional balance. Leadership is demanding and the people who can juggle multiple demands, but remain focused on a group’s goals are the ones who are likely to succeed.
Recommendation
- Listen attentively to your team to understand their perspectives
- Create and maintains good working relationships with other people.
- Feel what other people are feeling so you can put yourself in their shoes.
- Read non-verbal cues, read messages conveyed by facial gestures, posture, eye movement, and body language. When you enter into the realm of leadership, you are in the business of people. Inspiring and motivating people to get things done. You lead by example, and you are comfortable with the uncertainty that leadership can bring and as such you are flexible in adapting to new challenges and nimble in adjusting to sudden change.
Leaders who have high standards not only for themselves but for others continually learn how to improve performance, along with their team. They see opportunity in situations where others would see a setback and lead others positively, from diverse backgrounds and cultures to create an atmosphere of respect, helpfulness, and cooperation.
Leadership is about people, and if you want to become an effective leader, you must draw others into active commitment to the team’s effort and build a spirit of positive relationships and create a sense of purpose beyond the day-to-day tasks of your people.